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Amnesty post: Week 11 - Limn

First-ever fic, but it's been bouncing around my head since the last amnesty.

Team Shadow Puppet Theater Night in Plato’s Cave

This week, the quantum mirror is showing a John and a Rodney down one of the infinite other legs of the trousers of time (with apologies to George Orwell: see fascism, jackbooted octopus of) on a New England beach. Teyla is making her excuses (Ronon walked out as soon as he realized it wasn’t the one where he writes poetry about his penis).

Sheppard, who was raised to be a gentleman, feels as if he should at least make a serious effort to make her feel like a valued guest. It avails him, as they say, naught.

“I am sorry, John,” she said, calmly. “I was hoping that this week we would see the reality in which I am a highly-regarded business woman, in hopes that I might learn something I can use to help my people.”

“Oh,” Rodney pulls a small bit of his attention away from watching other-himself watching other-John watching other-him right back. “I like that one. John gives me coffee and pastries in that one.”

“...but” she sailed on, as though no-one had spoken, “I do not feel that I can justify the evening away from my family to revisit this particular reality. I have, after all, seen you both eat sandwiches and nap.”

At that point, John may have elbowed Rodney in a sensitive spot (because really? Not. Helping.), and Rodney leapt, none-too-subtly rubbing his sensitive spot and looking equal parts awkward and only-very-slightly wounded, into the fray.

“But” and he’s clearly trying Very Hard Indeed to be smooth about this, “I’m sure your people will benefit from your exposure to other cultures.”

Teyla’s face falls into that configuration of perfect serenity with one delicately arched eyebrow which perfectly expresses what less talented faces require violent eyerolls and the international hand gesture for jerking off to achieve.

“My people,” she says gently to Rodney, heading out the door, “will call your people.”

John’s glaring at Rodney, who doesn’t even notice.

“Don’t we fuck kind of a lot in this one?” Rodney says, abstractedly, watching alter-him settle in on the couch with the cat.

Which, you know, John can just as easily be pissed off tomorrow.


( 29 comments — Leave a comment )
Nov. 7th, 2011 02:23 am (UTC)
LOL, yes. Movie nights give way to Quantum Mirror Nights, and Teyla grows exasperated at watching John and Rodney throw googly-eyes at each other in every reality known to man.

Also, I'd love to see that reality where Ronon writes poetry about his penis. Just sayin'.

ETA: Because I cannot type at 3AM--wait, it's ONLY NINE THIRTY?? Damn you, daylight savings time...

Edited at 2011-11-07 02:25 am (UTC)
Nov. 7th, 2011 05:32 am (UTC)
Also, I'd love to see that reality where Ronon writes poetry about his penis. Just sayin'.

Nov. 7th, 2011 03:14 pm (UTC)
Isn't turgid mostly a penis-related word? Because that one's out there...
Nov. 7th, 2011 03:15 pm (UTC)
Poor Teyla. She so often seems like the only adult at the day care.

Thanks (frist).
Nov. 7th, 2011 02:31 am (UTC)
“My people,” she says gently to Rodney, heading out the door, “will call your people.”

Best use of Teyla's people EVAR. This is delightful!
Nov. 7th, 2011 11:38 am (UTC)

Teyla strikes me as a woman with a wicked sense of humor.
Nov. 7th, 2011 03:24 am (UTC)
I also enjoy the "Quantum Mirror Night"...

Fun fic.... see? Now you have to do more!
Nov. 7th, 2011 11:35 am (UTC)
Thank you. I signed up for bingo - I'm thinking of using this as my wild card - so hopefully at least four more.
Nov. 7th, 2011 03:41 am (UTC)
hahaha, that was way fun, and a brilliant idea.

I've added your author tag and the prompt tags, but I'm not clear on what others you want (John/Rodney, e.g.) can you please add?
Nov. 7th, 2011 11:34 am (UTC)
Thank you. I'm especially pleased you liked it, since some of the AU stuff is yours.

I updated the tags, but I meant it to be PG (for language) and somehow got R as well, which seems like overkill but it's not letting me delete it.
Nov. 7th, 2011 06:51 pm (UTC)
I've deleted the R.

I wondered about the cat. :) Loved Teyla's concise expressions. And her meta. If I were Teyla and Ronon I would stage an AU coup and use John and Rodney as furniture for a story or ten in revenge.
Nov. 8th, 2011 01:48 am (UTC)
Well, the cat, but also a John keeping a Rodney supplied with baked goods and coffee.

Me, I heart Teyla. She handles being the designated grownup with such grace.
Nov. 7th, 2011 08:40 am (UTC)
Quantum Mirror Night is a great idea. To me, it would be way more mesmerizing than Harry Potter's Mirror of Erised.
Nov. 7th, 2011 03:16 pm (UTC)
I'd be constantly adjusting my hair, but yeah, it does sound like fun, doesn't it?
Nov. 7th, 2011 09:50 am (UTC)
Oh yes!
The Trousers of Time
the internation hand gesture for jerking off
This is such fun. And a first too? Really?
Well you must have at it and write more... please?
Nov. 7th, 2011 03:18 pm (UTC)
Pretty much. I've never written much fiction.

I have to admit that the trousers of time belong to Terry Pratchett,and I suspect the international hand gesture for jerking off springs from mankind's collective unconscious (although it's possible I feel that way because I live really close to Brooklyn).
(Deleted comment)
Nov. 7th, 2011 02:59 pm (UTC)
Nov. 7th, 2011 03:19 pm (UTC)
Well, practically a drabble, but I got my toes wet.

*grin* back.
Nov. 7th, 2011 06:42 pm (UTC)
HA, Teyla! I love it when she's NOT a Rodney/John fangirl, and like, has a life. (I mean, I love both, don't get me wrong, but...yes.)

Now I want to write/read AUs where Teyla is a kick ass business professional. Seriously, this was pretty hilarious and awesome. I'm so delighted to host your first fic ever here! More to come, I hope!
Nov. 8th, 2011 01:59 am (UTC)
Thanks. Teyla is a favorite of mine.

I like this Teyla, with the added bonus that she has a crush on Radek, who is sixteen kinds of awesome.
Nov. 8th, 2011 12:38 am (UTC)
Very unique story idea. I liked it a lot. You've certainly got Teyla down to a T, and I like your descriptions of the other characters, too. Great job.
Nov. 8th, 2011 02:03 am (UTC)
Thank you. Patient-but-not-forever Teyla is a favorite of mine.
Nov. 8th, 2011 10:00 pm (UTC)
Oh this is so funny. Great first fic.

Ronon writing poetry about his penis *smirks*

I loved this line by Teyla:

“My people,” she says gently to Rodney, heading out the door, “will call your people.”

Also was that a Terry Pratchett reference about the "Trousers of Time"? because he uses that one a lot.

Nov. 10th, 2011 01:05 am (UTC)
It really truly was. I'm a Vimes girl.

Actually, my kid is a Vimes girl too. We're sort of a Vimes family.
Nov. 10th, 2011 05:53 pm (UTC)
I'm a Vimes girl too! What were the odds on that (probably a million to one *smirks*)

I should add you to my flist!

I love all of the books, but the "Guards" series was my favorite.

I realised after I posted that you'd already commented that it was a Pratchet ref *facepalms*

Nov. 9th, 2011 01:37 pm (UTC)
Love Teyla's humor. Cute idea!
Nov. 10th, 2011 01:08 am (UTC)
Thanks. I really wish Teyla had been given more of a chance to not be quite as noble and serene occasionally on the show.
Nov. 10th, 2011 04:18 am (UTC)
“My people,” she says gently to Rodney, heading out the door, “will call your people.”

I am unoriginal but I like that line. It's delivered at the perfect time.

“Don’t we fuck kind of a lot in this one?” Rodney says, abstractedly, watching alter-him settle in on the couch with the cat.

Awesome. This was... your first fic? I... wow. Major league deal!
( 29 comments — Leave a comment )

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