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Title: Retaliatory Strike
Author: esteefee
Pairing: John/Rodney
Categories: pre-slash
Words: 433
Warnings: none
Summary: This means war.


Retaliatory Strike

by esteefee



"That unbelievable bastard," Rodney muttered to himself, viewing the ravages of his pilfered stash. He was missing two bottles of Visine, three boxes of tampons, a jumbo bottle of shampoo plus conditioner, and a container of premium skin cream. And he knew exactly who was to blame.

"Sheppard!" Rodney stomped into the weasel's quarters not three minutes later and found him lying on his bed.

Sheppard just raised his eyes from his comic book and gave Rodney a 'who me?' look.

"I'm talking to you, that's who," Rodney said, waving the now-empty box marked For Peer Review. "Did you think it would somehow escape my notice you'd made off with my stash?"

Sheppard continued paging through his comic. "Don't know what you're talking about, McKay."

"This is retribution for the Melaiya incident, isn't it? You honestly can't take a little joke—"

"Some joke." Sheppard raised an eyebrow.

"So, what, you lower yourself to theft? I need that stuff!"

A smirk lifted the corners of Sheppard's well-shaped mouth.

Rodney rolled his eyes. "Admittedly, not for my personal use so much as for trade."

Tossing his comic aside, Sheppard rolled to put his feet on the floor. "And what are you so keen to trade for all of a sudden?"

Well, that was a conversational hole Rodney didn't intend to trip into. "Just some items, here and there. That's beside the point."

But Sheppard was smirking like he already knew Rodney's intent. His next words confirmed it. "You use it to soften 'em up beforehand, right? Better than strawberries and champagne out here, offering the gals a box of tampons and some skin cream before your date."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Uh-huh. So," John slouched back onto his elbows and gave him a beatific smile, "guess you'll be working under a bit of a handicap. Like certain people who got 'accidentally' hosed down with machine oil just as they were making a play back on P6Z-892." John winked. "Seems to me we're even Steven."

Rodney scowled. It appeared to have no effect whatsoever on John's peaceful little smile.

"Fine, then, Major. I'll take up your gauntlet. We'll see who has the last laugh."

John squinted at him. But he was still smiling a little, and Rodney couldn't help wondering why, as he formulated a plan, he felt more excitement than he had before getting ready for his date.

Which he'd just missed, being so hell-bent on talking to Sheppard.

The unbelievable bastard.

Rodney couldn't help grinning in anticipation as he hurried back to his room.


End.


Comments

( 12 comments — Leave a comment )
saphirablue
Jan. 14th, 2012 07:48 am (UTC)
Prank war! \o/ *grins* Something like this so happened. :D

Thank you! :)
esteefee
Jan. 14th, 2012 08:27 pm (UTC)
\o/ I cry shenanigans!

Thank you. :)
goddess47
Jan. 14th, 2012 03:23 pm (UTC)
::giggle::

Oh. This would be epic!!!
esteefee
Jan. 14th, 2012 08:29 pm (UTC)
Radek, of course, is standing by with video recorder. He will capture *both* of them being idiots and later get paid off in blackmarket goods. :D
elderwitty
Jan. 14th, 2012 03:32 pm (UTC)
Retaliatory Strike
A smirk lifted the corners of Sheppard's well-shaped mouth.

Rodney's got it so bad - it's a shame his giant brain hasn't figured it out yet. (His forebrain anyway. Obviously his unconscious is already on board.)

Rodney couldn't help wondering why, as he stomped back to his quarters to formulate a plan, he felt more excitement than he'd had before getting ready for his date.

He's getting there, though, and I'll just sit here, grinning and waiting, until he does. I can't wait for the next installment. (Please say there will be a next installment.)

esteefee
Jan. 14th, 2012 08:32 pm (UTC)
Re: Retaliatory Strike
I don't know, it's all so puzzling, witty! For some reason Rodney continues to spill liquids on John in front of women. :D What can it mean? Why does John swipe all of Rodney's condoms right before he has a chance to close the deal with that pretty Dr. Robespierre?

Human nature is a complete mystery.
melagan
Jan. 14th, 2012 07:53 pm (UTC)
Oh Boys

*snicker*
esteefee
Jan. 14th, 2012 08:33 pm (UTC)
hee! *squoosh*
wolfshark
Jan. 14th, 2012 09:23 pm (UTC)
*dies*
esteefee
Jan. 14th, 2012 09:28 pm (UTC)
Cockblock Smackdown!
popkin16
Jan. 16th, 2012 03:45 am (UTC)
Oh, *boys*

This made me grin :D JUST SKIP THE SHENANIGANS AND HOOK UP~!
esteefee
Jan. 22nd, 2012 10:22 pm (UTC)
INORITE? :DDD
( 12 comments — Leave a comment )

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