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TITLE: Whispers in the Dark
AUTHORS: squidgiepdx  and elderwitty 
FANDOMS: Stargate Atlantis
WORDS:  266
WARNINGS: Mention of canon character death from the show.
NOTES:  This is something a little different from us. 



Ronon looks down through the gloom of twilight, even candlelight too bright for his somber mood.  "I think you would’ve liked it here," he murmurs, "and you'd love my teammates.  Teyla, especially - she's a lot like you."  Memory fosters the barest curve of a smile, there and gone in an instant.  "Smart.  Caring.  Devoted.  Reminds me of you when-"  He falls silent.

He watches the last remnants of sunset trail over his few belongings in lieu of confronting feelings he's successfully avoided for years.  "You'd like Sheppard, too.  He's a good soldier; a good leader.  And McKay..."  With a soft snort, he confesses, "You two’d probably butt heads since you're both so..."  Pig-headed is harsh, so he reaches for something gentler, more politic.  "...strong-minded.  They're good people.  And they trust me."  The smile reappears as memories of his life in Atlantis flicker through his mind.  "Make me feel like I belong.  Like I'm not lost anymore."

Sitting alone in the dark, he lets that feeling chip away at the overwhelming sense of loss he's carried since before he started Running.  He strokes the pale blue ribbon she used to tie her hair up at the hospital; always in a perfect little bow on the side.  He would pull it loose the moment she got home, spilling her hair across his chest as he tumbled them back on the bed.  The same ribbon he’d had, by chance, stashed in a pocket, when the attack took her from him.

Sliding the fabric through his fingers, silky fibers briefly catching against calluses, he whispers, "I miss you, Melena."



( 33 comments — Leave a comment )
Jul. 28th, 2011 01:42 am (UTC)
oh, sweet Ronon. I love that he managed to carry away at least one thing. this is lovely:

Memory fosters the barest curve of a smile,

And I so love that he tells her about his team and those features she would like, to let her know he isn't alone, and to remind himself, as well, perhaps. but his grief is still so palpable.

*hugs him*
Jul. 28th, 2011 02:08 am (UTC)
I'd told elderwitty that I wanted us to do a character piece, but I honestly couldn't come up with an idea - at least one that wasn't "contrived" or had really been done before/done to death. And then the idea of Ronon hit me, and that's that.

That line is so delicate and intricately beautiful; I think it's one of my favorites. And it's all elderwitty. I gave her a line close to that in concept, and she came back with that; it almost took my breath away. She's f'ing brilliant.
Oh, stop, you. :blush: - elderwitty - Jul. 29th, 2011 07:11 am (UTC) - Expand
Re: Oh, stop, you. :blush: - squidgiepdx - Jul. 30th, 2011 05:00 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: Oh, stop, you. :blush: - elderwitty - Jul. 31st, 2011 05:59 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: Oh, stop, you. :blush: - squidgiepdx - Jul. 30th, 2011 05:13 pm (UTC) - Expand
Re: Oh, stop, you. :blush: - elderwitty - Jul. 31st, 2011 06:04 pm (UTC) - Expand
Jul. 28th, 2011 03:16 am (UTC)
I think Ronon is so open for character development by fans because the show writers just didn't know what to do with him, or how to flesh him out. It makes him PERFECT for character exploration - and this? Is a marvelously somber and tender moment of character exploration. So well done!
Jul. 30th, 2011 07:31 am (UTC)
Whispers in the Dark
You got that right! They introduced a really cool character with a neat, interesting background, then promptly relegated him to background barbarian eye candy status most of the time.

Luckily, Jason (like the rest of the main cast) was able to give us hints, glimmers, and notes on Ronan's being and interests that were far beyond what the writers ever came up with.

Thanks for the kind words. It keeps amazing me, what the two of us get up to. :D
(no subject) - squidgiepdx - Jul. 30th, 2011 05:10 pm (UTC) - Expand
Jul. 28th, 2011 07:16 am (UTC)
Jul. 30th, 2011 07:32 am (UTC)
whispers in the dark

(no subject) - squidgiepdx - Jul. 30th, 2011 05:08 pm (UTC) - Expand
Jul. 29th, 2011 12:15 am (UTC)
How beautiful...I love stories about Ronon's life and you are so right, they are few and far between (I'm guilty...I have trouble writing about any of them but Sheppard!)

"Make me feel like I belong. Like I'm not lost anymore."

Says it all...

Very nicely done.
Jul. 30th, 2011 07:40 am (UTC)
whispers in the dark
Thanks! It would never have occurred to me to write a Ronon piece - that was all squidgie's doing. I wouldn't have thought I had the correct grasp of his character, but it did seem to insert itself into my beta/edit/co-writing process. I'd like to do another - just have to hope the muse swoops down again.

I think it was the hope of that sort of feeling that kept him in the city, even more than the higher level of technology/security.

Thanks again for the kind words.
(no subject) - squidgiepdx - Jul. 30th, 2011 05:07 pm (UTC) - Expand
Jul. 29th, 2011 12:38 am (UTC)
Awww, Ronon! This is precious. Thank you for this!
Jul. 30th, 2011 07:46 am (UTC)
whispers in the dark
Thanks! Yeah, Ronon didn't get nearly enough love from the writers. It's up to all of us now.

Re: whispers in the dark - squidgiepdx - Sep. 5th, 2011 07:30 am (UTC) - Expand
Re: whispers in the dark - elderwitty - Sep. 5th, 2011 10:30 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - squidgiepdx - Jul. 30th, 2011 05:06 pm (UTC) - Expand
Jul. 30th, 2011 01:39 pm (UTC)
Oh Ronon! *hugs him*

Wonderful story!

Thank you!
Jul. 30th, 2011 05:02 pm (UTC)
Yeah... He just looks so damn cuddly that you want to hug him. Though he'll probably just toss you into a wall if you did. :)

Thank you! This one is rapidly becoming my favorite story we've written this year! :)
Jul. 30th, 2011 05:01 pm (UTC)
Oh Ronon. This is lovely.
Jul. 30th, 2011 05:05 pm (UTC)
Thank you!!!! You know Ronon would be all quiet & reserved, and this just seemed like something he would do - quietly - on his own.
Jul. 31st, 2011 08:57 am (UTC)
Beautifully written - love the very start: Ronon looks down through the gloom of twilight, even candlelight too bright for his somber mood. It sets the scene so well.
Jul. 31st, 2011 06:39 pm (UTC)
Thank you! elderwitty and I make such an awesome team! This was our first foray into a character study, and I just love, love, love it.
Jul. 31st, 2011 04:32 pm (UTC)
What a beautiful piece. How easy it is to forget the things that Ronon lost. I think that they so woefully trivialised Ronon's losses on the show that I certainly find it is easy to forget who he used to be, what he used to have before the Wraith took it all.

Thank you for reminding me.
Jul. 31st, 2011 06:40 pm (UTC)
And thank you for commenting! Yeah, the SGA writers never did Ronon justice, beyond his "warrior" backstory, so this was way of righting that. :)
Aug. 1st, 2011 01:12 am (UTC)
So sad, yet hopeful and beautiful. Just love Ronon keeping the memories of his old life, while allowing himself to reach for the new. Wonderful character piece!
Aug. 1st, 2011 04:24 am (UTC)
Thank you so much! This one truly was an incredible one for us. :)
Aug. 1st, 2011 06:47 pm (UTC)
That's really very lovely. I do like Ronon - so woefully underused most of the time - and I love the depth of feeling you've given him here, a man living with loss and regrets but anchored now for the first time in years, and able (again possibly for the first time in years) able to look forward while he makes his peace with the past. Very nice indeed.
Aug. 1st, 2011 06:52 pm (UTC)
Thank you! We knew Ronon was painfully unused on the show, and this was the perfect piece for us to try and right that. I'm glad you liked it!
( 33 comments — Leave a comment )

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